Hustle & Bustle Bitches!

Last night, Jimmy (my new roommate), creepily (acting like a cute baby, but coming across as a child molester) hands me two presents which I graciously accept and put them under the palm tree next to me. He asked, “Well, aren’t you going to open them?” “Not until Christmas.” I said. So then he stomps off pouting. Of course I knew exactly what is in the packages as soon as I touched them. A football (I like the Panthers, but I have touched a football about twice in my life.) and a pair of shitty ass headphones [to the right]-(What makes headphones shitty? Basically it’s the amount of foam around the ears and bass response. Good headphones don’t have foam and usually encase the whole ear to reduce ambient noise.)

You know, I don’t ask for much for Christmas: a motorcycle, an iPod, ok-ok-ok maybe that is a little too much; but headphones and a toboggan aren’t exactly difficult. I would think that someone would shell out at least $20 for a set of good headphones, but around Christmas, it’s all about making sure that EVERYONE gets at least SOMETHING, even though most people end up ‘giving away’ (re-gifting) or ‘throwing away’ half of the crap they get around the holidays.

Someone needs to invent a consignment place that will exchange just about anything for cash. I guess that would be called a Pawn Shop, but Pawn shops don’t take crappy headphones or footballs (which both things can be bought together for less than $10 at just about anywhere, and is probably the reason why Pawn shops don’t accept them.)

Christmas just keeps growing and growing each year, it’s pretty sad. Growing in the corporate ‘buy-buy-buy’ way and ‘hustle and bustle’ way, but not in ‘holiday cheer’ or ‘kindness to man and child’ way. The only time that I actually get the ‘Christmas warm and fuzzies’ is when it’s actually Christmas day, after all the presents, when everyone is just sitting around in the sea of wrapping paper and gifts, sipping coffee or eggnog, and listening to Christmas music at 8am.